Another one under the belt...
So, I have gotten through another day. Sometimes it is easier than others. There is still apart of me that doesn't yet comprehend that all that I have is mine. This is my apartment. These are my things. Those are my bills. I have to actually clean now. I was definetly pampered at Dad and Neen's since they had a biweekly cleaning woman. I am also not so use to having to do my laundry out of the house. I need to suck it up and go to the laundry mat, but I don't want to go alone. I have a very fond memory of one of the only times I have been to the laundry mat. Georgia and I did a marathon laundry day/night. I think we ended up doing between us over thirty loads of laundry. What can I say she has a kid, washed some of Sam's clothes (which by the way if anyone knows how to contact Sam, I and several others would really like to see him and Curtis), I am a bad person. I luckily (unluckily) have less clothes now since Des helped me pare down my rather lackluster wardobe.I can't wait to be home this weekend to celebrate Kat's birthday. I think it will be a lot of fun and mayhem.
Oh, before I forget, Cincinnati has a huge Labor Day weekend celebration that I thought it would be fun to have a lot of people show up for. Call me or reply to my post if you are interested. I would love some guests now that I am more settled. I am hoping to have my project finished by then so I will want to celebrate that also. Hopefully.
Unicorns mean peace,
Juls
posted by Julie @ 10:49 PM
6 Comments:
Julie, I am glad you have this time to grow as a person. That is something I missed out on. I do believe that living on your own plays an important part in a person's development. It will help you become more confident and self-reliant. I know in my heart that you will do well. You do not mind being alone, and enjoy solitude. I have times that I feel the same. I just get so tired of dealing with other people. Usually that means I am overdue for a long vacation. I am letting work get on my nerves way too much lately, and that is a sure sign. I am just praying that our trip goes well. Linda called yesterday and said that Richard has been calling her frequently, and wants her to come up there. Of course she has ten reasons why she cannot. Anyway, she seems to think Alison is doing better. I told her you are having to adjust to being away, and she said call Alison and complain because you have had to listen to her for so long!! Turn about is fair play. Anyway, I enjoyed reading your journel. Take Care Love, Mom
I know what you mean by being tired of other people. I have to be outgoing at work and school and I have to make it seem like I want to talk to everyone. By the time I get home I am so done with talking to people I don't know. My fellow graduate students seem to mostly be extroverts, while I am an introvert. It is one thing I will just have to get use to.
I know that your trip will go wonderfully. While I have not been everywhere you are going to go up there, it is truly a beautiful part of the world. Alison loved it while she was visiting Stacey. Said she would even move there possibly one day.
I think we should work on Aunt Linda and Uncle Tommy to come up here. I think we should all boycott going to see them until they come here. It is only fair. And we can dangle the horse tracks in Indy and Cincinnati and the gambling boats.
Thank you so much for posting mom. I love you and hope you and Mike are both doing well. Love always,
Juls
Mom is sooo sweet...
I am OneHottBlog by the way.
Kathy
Well Julie,
You can always call and complain to me about anything. Sometimes my mom is such a bitch in how she puts things.
Of course you can call me if you need to talk, and I know I can call you. I think what happend in September was that I could call a million people and not say the things that needed to be said the most.
Depression is just hate turned inward. And trying to kill yourself is the ultimate kind of self-hate. I wish my mom could pull her head out of her bum enough to know that when you're depressed if you can't call your best friend/ cousin to help you through the hard times... than there is no point in getting through the hard times.
Also-- I know what a burdon it was on you and everyone...and it makes me feel sad and ashamed that I ever had to go through it... but you know... it wasn't like my choice...it was just an event that happened. You didn't have to be there for me through any of it, but you were and for that I love you even more and am grateful.. and glad. But I can't always feel like this tremendous burden. You know.. So if you're upset about it than tell me... but I don't think you are.
God my mom is so upsetting sometimes.
Anyway... alright well I'll talk to you later and hopefully see you in like a week.
love,
Alison
I think it is very important to note that there aren't really that much I have to complain about. Second, I have never told anyone not to come to me for help. I will always be willing to hear what you have to say. Granted, Alison, when you were calling all the time, I did have to take a step back, but that was more for my sanity under not only the pressure that you were under but the pressure I was under in school. However, not only in your time of need did you let me take a step back, but you realized I was not the only one you could talk to. I know that you and kathy have become very close since all that happened and I think it is wonderful.
In order to be a burden, the party that you are leaning on for support must feel put upon. I can say that there were very few times you were an actual burden. And I also think you have landed very well on your own. Yes you had to talk through somethings, but you were the only one that could actually make the decision to get better, and you did.
I am at work, so I have to go, but I just wanted to take the time to answer this comment. Everyone has to adjust to life when it changes. Some people are good at it, some people are not, and some people avoid it some much they never leave their comfort zone. I think it is important to recognize which you are.
Peace,
Juls
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